My name is Jessica Leong Mei Ling
Friends call me Jess,special ones call me Jessy.
I'm 17 this year.
I am a year younger than all my peers,but i never feel left out,thankfully.
I love my family to bits.
My dad is my hero.
My mum is my rock.
My brother is my favourite.
Friendship is important to me.
I love talking on the phone knowing i'll regret the bill later on.
I want to be there for you when you need it, whoever u may be.
I'm afraid of hurting others.
I put others before me,even if i'll get hurt.
i DO care what others think of me, i can't help it.
I love singing in the shower,
I love singing with my friends.
I love dancing cause it helps me to forget.
I love swimming cause it gives me freedom.
I love God cause he created us all.
I love stars and sandy beaches.
I hate liars and smokers.
I love cakes and potatoes.
I wish there was absolute peace in this world.
I love the colour purple and hate sour stuff. I'm a die hard romantic at heart.
I want a loyal loving husband.
I want children of my own.
I want to earns big bucks,
to let my parents and brother indulge in the richness of life.
I fear insects
I fear loss.
I fear failure.
I fear rejection.
I'm loud and crazy.
I voice my insecurities through writing.
My anger lasts for only a fraction of time.
My spelling sucks.
I want to publish my own book someday.
I cry over sad stories and touching scenes.
I love hugs.
I want to travel the world.
I love music.
I'm still unsure of my career.
I love writing.
I love surprises. I never think i'm beautiful or special. I think i'm an insignificant part of the world. I have my times of tears and insecurities. I love to laugh and see people happy.
these are only a fraction of who i am.
I'm just another ordinary teenage girl.
hello world
hello world.
Hello world,
pleased to meet you.
::: love letters :::
i love them..
i mean love letters..especially the old fashioned ones..it doesn't have to be really long or formal..it may be a short rushed note saying "i love you =)" or better still " i miss you =)". It makes me feel really special that in the midst of all the hustle of a busy day, that special someone has taken the time to think of you. As they say, " I don't mind you looking at me and looking away, at least i know for that one moment of time, i was on you mind".
i know there's email and all these high tech stuff which would reach you in approximately 30 seconds or less..but to the person who will be my significant half, i'd love to share love letters with you. Real letters written on paper in ink. It does not have to be long ( but obviously mine will =p), but just the knowledge of your hands drifting across the sheet pouring out whatever emotions might be running through your head at that moment.
i guess i am a die hard romantic at heart =) prince charming,i'll be waiting,whoever u r!
i mean love letters..especially the old fashioned ones..it doesn't have to be really long or formal..it may be a short rushed note saying "i love you =)" or better still " i miss you =)". It makes me feel really special that in the midst of all the hustle of a busy day, that special someone has taken the time to think of you. As they say, " I don't mind you looking at me and looking away, at least i know for that one moment of time, i was on you mind".
i know there's email and all these high tech stuff which would reach you in approximately 30 seconds or less..but to the person who will be my significant half, i'd love to share love letters with you. Real letters written on paper in ink. It does not have to be long ( but obviously mine will =p), but just the knowledge of your hands drifting across the sheet pouring out whatever emotions might be running through your head at that moment.
i guess i am a die hard romantic at heart =) prince charming,i'll be waiting,whoever u r!
...love bug...
now i'm speechless,
over the edge im just breathless,
i'd never thought i would catch this,
love bug again...
hopeless,head over heels in the moment
i'd never thought i would get hit by this love bug again...
i can't get your smile out of my mind..
for some reason,this song has been stuck on my mind ESPECIALLY the highlighted line..
its nice,really..tho i hate jonas brothers =p
..rand0m..
i really can't help thinking that he is really cute =D its over n done but yeah! haha..these rand0m crushes are really amusing at times..i still remember my mum telling me once: when u grow up and reflect upon your life n laugh at how naive you once were! somehow, i have learnt never to regret any decision i make..whatever that decision may be..regret is probably one of the most painful thing a person has to go through. My dad always says, do it well once and leave no regrets.I shall pass through this path only once and may never come back again! So every happy memory, every relationship, every friendship, every crush and every fight i appreciate. Some of them may leave marks that may stay there forever,but at least i emerge wiser and more courages after the battle. =) I'm really glad that I'm still friends with people from my past. At times when things are ugly, i tend to switch them off my braincells. But when the fog clears and my path becomes easy once more, i open back my heart and invite them in once again,to repair our damaged bond and perhaps step towards a better tomorrow =) "open your heart" that is always my advice when people come to me with broken hearts. When you feel as if u never want to love another again, it is than that you have to open your heart. Not necessarily for another romance,but to things like friendship. I ended my first one with what others would say is a cruel breakup.But it was for our own good. He's really happy now and I'm happy for him =)Most may say that i have hurt him, but only those close to me knew that in the process,i hurt myself too. But it was also in that time span of healing, i opened my heart and only than i saw. I saw how much i neglected the world around me. My family, my friends and those strangers who later became the people whom i could not imagine living without. Of course i had no regrets going into that obligation in the first place. I was happy then, n i am glad it happened. So, what i'm trying to say is, i believe everything happens for a reason. No one crosses into the path of your life coincidently. God has made the prearrangement and they will be the reasons you are who you are today =)
...chinese new year!! .. =)
what? i'm late? eh...chinese new year is a 15 day celebration ok! =D
all in all, this year's chinese new year has been GREAT.FABULOUS! mostly because i get to have a longer break after 5 high school years. So it means i have more time to spend with my family!! =) but there was one significant difference in this year's celebration though. It was QUIET! haha..well of course it was drop dead silence la. But compared to 6 years ago(the last time i went back to kuantan), everyone has grown up so much that the degree of hustling activities and sound of excited footsteps of children has dropped significantly!! it just makes me feel very..grown up -.-
but the excitement was there. The late nights activities,gambling,eating,drinking and talking!!! it feels great to be with your loved ones.it feels great to know that no matter how much i have grown up, there is still a special placed called home. A place where is still can turn to and shut out all the problems.
The greatest gift from g0d? My family definitely. I wouldn't trade them for the world. Not even if u try to bribe me with cake, chocolates or potatoes..not even for a scholarship or ten scholarships for that matter! My dad,mum and brother are perfect the way they are and i don't want a single thing about the changed. Cuz without them, i am not who i am today!
so ppl, g0ng xi fa cai! xing nian kuai le! wan shi ru yi! shen ti jian kang!
may the year of the tiger bring r0aring good luck to all!
all in all, this year's chinese new year has been GREAT.FABULOUS! mostly because i get to have a longer break after 5 high school years. So it means i have more time to spend with my family!! =) but there was one significant difference in this year's celebration though. It was QUIET! haha..well of course it was drop dead silence la. But compared to 6 years ago(the last time i went back to kuantan), everyone has grown up so much that the degree of hustling activities and sound of excited footsteps of children has dropped significantly!! it just makes me feel very..grown up -.-
but the excitement was there. The late nights activities,gambling,eating,drinking and talking!!! it feels great to be with your loved ones.it feels great to know that no matter how much i have grown up, there is still a special placed called home. A place where is still can turn to and shut out all the problems.
The greatest gift from g0d? My family definitely. I wouldn't trade them for the world. Not even if u try to bribe me with cake, chocolates or potatoes..not even for a scholarship or ten scholarships for that matter! My dad,mum and brother are perfect the way they are and i don't want a single thing about the changed. Cuz without them, i am not who i am today!
so ppl, g0ng xi fa cai! xing nian kuai le! wan shi ru yi! shen ti jian kang!
may the year of the tiger bring r0aring good luck to all!
...=D...
I MISS YOU
SYAZELEEN.ZAABA.FELICIA.NADIA.SARA.CHIX.ROSE.ZATIE.AZ.KAPEE.ASHRAF.AFIF.ZAKI.MI.AF.SYAF.RIF.NABIL.MARC
WISHING YOU GUYS ARE HERE THIS VERY MOMENT,
TO MAKE THINGS OKAY JUST THE WAY YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS DO.
THE LAUGHTER TEARS AND BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES
WILL NEVER DEPART FROM ME NO MATTER WHAT
WHEREVER YOU ARE,
NO MATTER HOW FAR THE DISTANCE..
NO MATTER HOW DIFFERENT THE TIME ZONE AND WEATHER,
PROMISE ME TO LIVE YOUR LIVES TO THE FULLEST
AND BE HAPPY!
CAUSE ONLY THAN WILL I BE CONTENTED..
FOR THE ONES I LOVE ARE LOVING THEMSELVES AND DOING WELL.
FROM YOUR HAPPINESS I SHALL DRAW STRENGTH
YOU GUYS WILL NEVER BE REPLACED
GOD BLESS =)
love,hugs and kisses,
JESS
::fear::
fear is such a scary presence..it suffocatres you..you become paralyzed and unable to think..n fear is excatly what i am experincing now..not one of my favourite emotions..
results are around the corner and it is certainly giving me a heart attack..blergh.my brain is filled with what ifs at the moment.what if i dun do well? what if in the midst of A's a B emerges? what if i do well but don't get a scholarship? what if my mum sponsors me and have not much left for my brother? what if i study law and when i graduate i find myself jobless?..these questions are really scary man..overall, i think i did quite well in my spm..yeah..if it was the basic A1 and A2 thingie,i'd be fine..but this A+ stuff is driving me crazy.Like literally.
My parents would always say,its okay, you've done your best. But being in kys for 5 years, i realized that "giving your best" is not enough. It is achieving that matters. And that mindset makes me tires,mentally and emotionally.
One thing that has changed in me is my ability to accept defeat. I used to get up again so easily,when i was younger..because ive always done well, and always been on top. Being in kys has somewhat brusied my ego, badly. Starting from my disability to perform well in track events during sports day, my confidence level was crushed way beyong the 0 point and altho i succeeded in many ways in the end, my confiodence never actually came back,fully. I fear failure, i fear humiliation and i fear being a burden to my parents. Ifear and i really fear.What should i do?
results are around the corner and it is certainly giving me a heart attack..blergh.my brain is filled with what ifs at the moment.what if i dun do well? what if in the midst of A's a B emerges? what if i do well but don't get a scholarship? what if my mum sponsors me and have not much left for my brother? what if i study law and when i graduate i find myself jobless?..these questions are really scary man..overall, i think i did quite well in my spm..yeah..if it was the basic A1 and A2 thingie,i'd be fine..but this A+ stuff is driving me crazy.Like literally.
My parents would always say,its okay, you've done your best. But being in kys for 5 years, i realized that "giving your best" is not enough. It is achieving that matters. And that mindset makes me tires,mentally and emotionally.
One thing that has changed in me is my ability to accept defeat. I used to get up again so easily,when i was younger..because ive always done well, and always been on top. Being in kys has somewhat brusied my ego, badly. Starting from my disability to perform well in track events during sports day, my confidence level was crushed way beyong the 0 point and altho i succeeded in many ways in the end, my confiodence never actually came back,fully. I fear failure, i fear humiliation and i fear being a burden to my parents. Ifear and i really fear.What should i do?
..i am missing you...
suddenly overcomed by this nostalgic feeling =( blergh..taylors is great really,seriously! but i miss them. I miss my crazy wonky best frens,who are also my dormmates! I miss my class,where the boys and girls squabble at each other and yet end up mising them each other so badly. I miss going down fr food early with nadia.I miss the pool.I MISS THE STUDIO! I miss them kiddos..I miss being metres apart from my frens' beds.I miss watching movies on chix's laptop and endless "promises" to study after this.waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!
felicia foo : i miss those times when i haul my extremely heavy luggage up the stairs and into my room to find : an elephant sleeping on it waving at me =p u have always been there for me and at the rght times scolded the hell out of me. Sure, i was angry as well, btu i believed everything happens for a reason n im glad i met u.U r da biggie sister i've always wanted.Enough said =)
nadia elena : I MISS YOU!! i wanna go lunch n dinner n breakfast with u early in the morning. I want to watch u pull that silly face when u eat oranges. I wanna kcu u n adk muck off =( I wanna jump on ur bed and hug tiny n pretend to cry over physics! Oh! I wanna stick sticky notes on the prep wall just like in form 3.I miss Ibu saying both of us berdating and we laugh ourselves silly over silly japanese programmes at the dining hall. I miss everything darn craz thing we do together =( I don't how we ended up such close frens but i know that this will never end! i sayang u! =)
sara salim : I MISS YOU TOO!! eurgh..i miss u telling me to be mean for my own good =p i miss u telling me u r fat and i'd rattle off just as how a daughter of a nurse would =) i miss being in the same room as you,the late night conversations and panicking when chix cries under her pillow(first time je la).I miss studying my brains out with you.u r a great2 buddy and i love your family as much as u love mine! course they are just so alike! muahx! hugs n kisses fr u x0x0x0 (i miss siddique =D, I miss him calling me asking what u have to bring for taman negara when his sister is in the SHOWER!)
izzati zainal : I miss your crying! HAHA! I MISS LAUGHING AT YOU! heh..i miss seeing u n sara fight tooth and foot over every little crazy thing and i'd be rolling and laughing like anythng. I miss being able to share all those "emotional" problems with you. I know you'd always understand best. I miss those times where you'd actually tell bout "dia" and "him"..i miss when you'd ask me which "him" and burst out laughing syok sndiri! haha =) we had our arguements and im glad their over. I love you babe =)
asyiqah hamdan :oh man,where do i start? i miss going to the studio with you, U r the one who would come to my bed and just cry and let it all out. You would be the one who understands me cause we have the same silly heart remember? I miss jumping on the bed trying to get maxis phone signals =p i miss hanging out with our little kiddos and getting hooked on it started with a kiss. You are one beautiful and strong babe and i'm proud to call u my fren! =) muahx!
azfar razak : bestfren =p haih..i miss siting in front of u durng math periods. i miss textig u n fighting over bm work.i miss writing those silly notes to annoy u and competing when copying chemistry work =) there were rough times and i really feared i lost you. I may not be so good in keeping in touch buddy,but do understand that u actually really mean a lot to me =) n i miss u =(
ashraf rauf : adek long akk yg tersayang =) i miss you heaps! i miss you telling me to smile and relax.i miss eating nearby u n giving you the looks only i can give.i miss ur random calls.i miss your randoms notes=) i miss hanging out kt tangga wit u.i miss hanging out in the studio with you.i miss u going "chiak!!,bdk bsar kne tdo awal!" I miss the way you'd actually spare time for me despite trying your best to spend time with nadia.thanks brother for knowing when i am down,n being there =) i miss u adik!
afifi hizami & zaki nor azlan : our time together has been short but i miss every single moment we spent together and ever single memory we created =) fif,m glad u have turned out into such a mature boy and now u even have a girl to call y0ur won. You have succesfully conquered your emotions and i am very proud of you.Zaki,my youngest brother, you have also grown into a good young man and have your own girl,altho you do not wish to tell me. I miss you both and pray that you would do well.Muahx!
nadjmi azamin : what has it been? 4 to 5 months max.but what we have shared,others may not experience it in their entire lifetime. Sometimes i get annoyed when i try to tell you my problems and you seem to shy away.But now i understand,G0d has sent me to you so that i may be your pillar, a place you can lean up against and stand tall again. Now you are strong, your confidence repaired,you can now spread your wings nd fly. I miss you, a lot and perharps when i am more settled, we can start talking again.I love you mi! =) be good!
so many more things i miss but if i cntinue,there wouldn't be enought space or words. I love you people and thank you for making me who i am today =)
May the sun always shine on your windowpane; May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain; May the hand of a friend always be near you; May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
felicia foo : i miss those times when i haul my extremely heavy luggage up the stairs and into my room to find : an elephant sleeping on it waving at me =p u have always been there for me and at the rght times scolded the hell out of me. Sure, i was angry as well, btu i believed everything happens for a reason n im glad i met u.U r da biggie sister i've always wanted.Enough said =)
nadia elena : I MISS YOU!! i wanna go lunch n dinner n breakfast with u early in the morning. I want to watch u pull that silly face when u eat oranges. I wanna kcu u n adk muck off =( I wanna jump on ur bed and hug tiny n pretend to cry over physics! Oh! I wanna stick sticky notes on the prep wall just like in form 3.I miss Ibu saying both of us berdating and we laugh ourselves silly over silly japanese programmes at the dining hall. I miss everything darn craz thing we do together =( I don't how we ended up such close frens but i know that this will never end! i sayang u! =)
sara salim : I MISS YOU TOO!! eurgh..i miss u telling me to be mean for my own good =p i miss u telling me u r fat and i'd rattle off just as how a daughter of a nurse would =) i miss being in the same room as you,the late night conversations and panicking when chix cries under her pillow(first time je la).I miss studying my brains out with you.u r a great2 buddy and i love your family as much as u love mine! course they are just so alike! muahx! hugs n kisses fr u x0x0x0 (i miss siddique =D, I miss him calling me asking what u have to bring for taman negara when his sister is in the SHOWER!)
izzati zainal : I miss your crying! HAHA! I MISS LAUGHING AT YOU! heh..i miss seeing u n sara fight tooth and foot over every little crazy thing and i'd be rolling and laughing like anythng. I miss being able to share all those "emotional" problems with you. I know you'd always understand best. I miss those times where you'd actually tell bout "dia" and "him"..i miss when you'd ask me which "him" and burst out laughing syok sndiri! haha =) we had our arguements and im glad their over. I love you babe =)
asyiqah hamdan :oh man,where do i start? i miss going to the studio with you, U r the one who would come to my bed and just cry and let it all out. You would be the one who understands me cause we have the same silly heart remember? I miss jumping on the bed trying to get maxis phone signals =p i miss hanging out with our little kiddos and getting hooked on it started with a kiss. You are one beautiful and strong babe and i'm proud to call u my fren! =) muahx!
azfar razak : bestfren =p haih..i miss siting in front of u durng math periods. i miss textig u n fighting over bm work.i miss writing those silly notes to annoy u and competing when copying chemistry work =) there were rough times and i really feared i lost you. I may not be so good in keeping in touch buddy,but do understand that u actually really mean a lot to me =) n i miss u =(
ashraf rauf : adek long akk yg tersayang =) i miss you heaps! i miss you telling me to smile and relax.i miss eating nearby u n giving you the looks only i can give.i miss ur random calls.i miss your randoms notes=) i miss hanging out kt tangga wit u.i miss hanging out in the studio with you.i miss u going "chiak!!,bdk bsar kne tdo awal!" I miss the way you'd actually spare time for me despite trying your best to spend time with nadia.thanks brother for knowing when i am down,n being there =) i miss u adik!
afifi hizami & zaki nor azlan : our time together has been short but i miss every single moment we spent together and ever single memory we created =) fif,m glad u have turned out into such a mature boy and now u even have a girl to call y0ur won. You have succesfully conquered your emotions and i am very proud of you.Zaki,my youngest brother, you have also grown into a good young man and have your own girl,altho you do not wish to tell me. I miss you both and pray that you would do well.Muahx!
nadjmi azamin : what has it been? 4 to 5 months max.but what we have shared,others may not experience it in their entire lifetime. Sometimes i get annoyed when i try to tell you my problems and you seem to shy away.But now i understand,G0d has sent me to you so that i may be your pillar, a place you can lean up against and stand tall again. Now you are strong, your confidence repaired,you can now spread your wings nd fly. I miss you, a lot and perharps when i am more settled, we can start talking again.I love you mi! =) be good!
so many more things i miss but if i cntinue,there wouldn't be enought space or words. I love you people and thank you for making me who i am today =)
May the sun always shine on your windowpane; May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain; May the hand of a friend always be near you; May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
..f0llow your heart..
This is dedicated to my very own favourite sister!! Lately she has been so coped up with her troubles and emotions that i can feel her suffocating in her own misery..so,
Dear Jesus,
I know have not been a very good girl..
I have my flaws and my mistakes often show..
Do take time and listen to this little prayer of mine,
Dedicated solely to a sister as special as old wine =D
You have placed in her path a men she seeks,
after years of searching she finally thinks,
that he'll be the one who makes her cheeks turn pink!
I know Dear Lord that you have plans for both of them,
Perharps its not for her to know just yet.
remind her lord that you would not place a test too heavy for that person to bear,
that you'll hover around to ensure she does not tear,
she's giving up hope so please bless her with wisdom,
to make a choice to stay or regain her freedom..
please remind her that mistakes are meant to be made,
that she shouldn't be afraid,
the tears may flow but behind those clouds is a shining sun..
let her know that love is a mystical game to play..
sometimes its years before we can say,
that you're the reason i'm here to stay!
so sister, sometimes its best to let your heart take the reigns.God bless! =)
...of children and innocence...
It was a rough day,really.literally.my sociology marks were far from satisfactory.i walked in the hot sun all the way to the ktm station as fast as my legs could take me..to find out that there was a problem with the power supply.i was sweating like a water tap turned on and i was NOT happy.in fact,unhappy was an understatement. I was on the verge of cursing my beloved motherland on the top of my lungs. Okay.That's not my point so i don't want to elaborate on it. I got on the train one and the half hours later,glad to be on a moving air conditioned train- before it stopped,AGAIN, 3 minutes after it started moving.And i ran out of credit.I was about to burst into tear (really,no joke) when a miracle happened : a beautiful baby with big round eyes turned towards me..and smiled.
That actually gave me an instant calming effect and i couldn't help smiling in return. My phone started to vibrate as my dad called me God was being kinder already,thank you God! I got a seat and looked at that baby again. He was barely able to sit up without the support of his mothers arms and yet he was so lively and bubbly. He smiled and gurgled and giggled at everyone who's attention he managed to catch and i actually caught 4 or 5 people smiling to themselves.His world was beautiful and perfect. What went wrong with our lives, the teens and adults?
Earnestly, children are little angels in disguise sent to remind us of the wonderful creations of God. Yeah sure, they bawl and scream and poop as they please.However, look into their eyes and you''ll never find anything as pure or innocent. It was children who were promised the entry into the Kingdom of Heaven. We were all once children,so pure and clean.Remember the days when colour and moving object sparked such curiousity? Remember the days where learning was such an easy task to accomplish? Recall the times where we trusted the judgement of another. What about the time where we viewed the world as a place for sharing and loving, a short pit stop before heaven? Where has the excitement on Christmas mornings gone to?
On the way home, i questioned myself about the mystical "disappearence" of the child inside of me. Why is it that i have learnt to be so judgemental and to pass random comments without scaning them first? It is probably the nature of the world today where the innocent and naive would be cheated and trampled upon.
Growing up, we learnt to decide what is right and wrong and in this far from pretty reality, we loose the inner child. Beloved friends, take a break from your hectic schedule and spare a few moments to think. For once, take of the glasses of an adult and view the world once again from the perspective of the child you once were. Envision your past dreams, and simple wishes. Perharps wishing that daddy can play ball with you. Or wishing that mommy does not have to come back late tonight.Or even wishes that mummy and daddy would stop fighting. Recall those wishes and fit them into the scenario of your present life.Are your own children wishing for the same "simple" wishes too? Remember how your parents once taught you to say "please" and "thank you"? Practise that towards your colleagues and friends and you would realize how such a basic thing a child does effortlessly has become a foreign language to you. As a child you once had "conversations" with Jesus.Do you still remember how? It really is simple actually... Start by saying " Hello Jesus! I'm so sorry ive been too busy for ...the past ten years. I just came by to say i missed you and i would like to tell you about my day...." Praying is something adults are too busy to spare time for, but a child never forgets.
Rewaking the inner child might be just the answer for adults who are struggling with thier current lives.Close your eyes,count to ten and look at the world through the eyes of an untarnished child.
Perharps, the world would be colorful and sunny once again =)
That actually gave me an instant calming effect and i couldn't help smiling in return. My phone started to vibrate as my dad called me God was being kinder already,thank you God! I got a seat and looked at that baby again. He was barely able to sit up without the support of his mothers arms and yet he was so lively and bubbly. He smiled and gurgled and giggled at everyone who's attention he managed to catch and i actually caught 4 or 5 people smiling to themselves.His world was beautiful and perfect. What went wrong with our lives, the teens and adults?
Earnestly, children are little angels in disguise sent to remind us of the wonderful creations of God. Yeah sure, they bawl and scream and poop as they please.However, look into their eyes and you''ll never find anything as pure or innocent. It was children who were promised the entry into the Kingdom of Heaven. We were all once children,so pure and clean.Remember the days when colour and moving object sparked such curiousity? Remember the days where learning was such an easy task to accomplish? Recall the times where we trusted the judgement of another. What about the time where we viewed the world as a place for sharing and loving, a short pit stop before heaven? Where has the excitement on Christmas mornings gone to?
On the way home, i questioned myself about the mystical "disappearence" of the child inside of me. Why is it that i have learnt to be so judgemental and to pass random comments without scaning them first? It is probably the nature of the world today where the innocent and naive would be cheated and trampled upon.
Growing up, we learnt to decide what is right and wrong and in this far from pretty reality, we loose the inner child. Beloved friends, take a break from your hectic schedule and spare a few moments to think. For once, take of the glasses of an adult and view the world once again from the perspective of the child you once were. Envision your past dreams, and simple wishes. Perharps wishing that daddy can play ball with you. Or wishing that mommy does not have to come back late tonight.Or even wishes that mummy and daddy would stop fighting. Recall those wishes and fit them into the scenario of your present life.Are your own children wishing for the same "simple" wishes too? Remember how your parents once taught you to say "please" and "thank you"? Practise that towards your colleagues and friends and you would realize how such a basic thing a child does effortlessly has become a foreign language to you. As a child you once had "conversations" with Jesus.Do you still remember how? It really is simple actually... Start by saying " Hello Jesus! I'm so sorry ive been too busy for ...the past ten years. I just came by to say i missed you and i would like to tell you about my day...." Praying is something adults are too busy to spare time for, but a child never forgets.
Rewaking the inner child might be just the answer for adults who are struggling with thier current lives.Close your eyes,count to ten and look at the world through the eyes of an untarnished child.
Perharps, the world would be colorful and sunny once again =)
latin dancing baby!!
hola pe0ple!
i was so tensed up when i heard rum0urs about the results of spm that i actually spent hald the night annoying every0ne on my phonebook list =D haha! one very expensive way of stress relieving but useful all the same =)
i was so tensed up when i heard rum0urs about the results of spm that i actually spent hald the night annoying every0ne on my phonebook list =D haha! one very expensive way of stress relieving but useful all the same =)
but what actually made me find time to tap away on this keyboard was my latin dancing class!! I'm not excatly the best salsa dancer but just dancing helps the worries melt away..
there is simply somthing bout keeping in time with the rhythm, responding to the signals from your partner and simply working it out =)
Dancing is a great way of making new frens!!
My dance instructor actually made us change partners 3 times and that's already 3 new friends made! =)
but really, dancing is n0t the only alternative of smiling again, it works wonders on me but may not be so effective on another..
so my advice people, find out what that stress reliever may be for you..
it may be music, singing,talking(these 3 works well for me too!!) or even cam-whoring!
knowing what helps you allievate stress would really come in handy when you need to make your heart rate fall to a normal pace in a short time!
always make it a point to remember that nothing is ever too big a problem to be solved.
yeah,if u ask my friends and people who know me well,
they'll tell you that i am easily conquered by blind panic! n that is really very true...
but after talking to friends, the tensi0n really dies away..
after all, all the current fears we face would soon be something we laugh at in the future.
the w0rld may seem like it's c0ming to an end..but trust me, g0d won't let us escape s0 easily..He's still has various plans f0r us people..
s0 remember,
whenever God closes a door,
somewhere else he would open a wind0w..
it is because we spend too much time looking at the closed door,
that we fail to see the window..
look towards the sunshine friends,and hapinness would come knocking on your door =)
love,
jess
smile
inspired by my ex english teacher's essay title =)
valentine's day influenced =D
It was a chilly Sunday morning as i sat staring at the morning sun.The sound of children's laughter drifted up to me and warmed up my bones from the icy fingers of Jack Frost.The melody of chirping birds transported me back to a brighter summer day..where my steps were lighter and the lines of age were yet to be etched on my features...
30th January,1910
I was at a pool party,enjoying myself..The music was great and the atmosphere was simply lively..Meeting up up with old friends,making new ones,it seemed as if the night could not get any better. Than he came,n he smiled.
"Hey,i'm Simon.This song is really lovely..so,may i have this dance?...."
12th January,1910
It was our first date..N i was feeling rather nervous..He came with a smile, the very same one that i fell for.He held out a rose,a pretty pink one.A small note was attached to the rose and it said
"It's okay if you're not prepared to be in love with me so soon.I know you've been through enough to have your doubts.We don't need to go that far,let's hold on to where we are. For i have faith that if its real we'll make it through.All i'll ever need is you" It was a wonderful day.
14th February 1912
We were at the airport,silent,fingers intertwined. His luggage has already been hauled onto the plane. The last call for his flight has been announced.My fingers tightened as an invisble hand squeezed my throat. He turned around and gave me that beautiful smile once more.Strong as ever,my darling boy
." Darling, i'll have to go now. The time has come for me to study abroad and it would be a long lonely 5 years.I wish i could keep you for myself but that would me selfish of me and cruel to you. I''ll go now and fulfill my dreams of being the perfect husband for you.While i'm gone,i'll not refrain you from other men that may come knocking on the doors of your heart. When i return, you shall be the first person i seek and i'll claim your heart if it is still mine to be owned.I'll wait,and even if my love is in vain,i'll never love another as much as i love you".
When his lips touched mine, i savoured every moment. I sent him off with a brave smile and watched him disappear into the crowd. And i broke down,and cried.
14th March 1917
He was due to return today. We both fulfilled our promise of abstinence from any sort of communication during the 5 years. Longing and missing him has been hard,but i preservered and carried on with my life. Finally that telegram came,announcing his return.I nervously smoothered my hair and looked out for that familiar face. A surge of blood rushed to my cheeks and i realized it was the very same smile.
He's back...
1st of January 1920
Our wedding date.
"I want to make it a double celebration every year love, your birthday and our anniversary.This way, even when i'm old and wrinkled and my memory fades,i'll never forget this date.The begining of every year, a new meaning for us both"
As i walked down that aisle, he stood at the end,tall and proud. We brought up 2 children, both just as handsome and as loving as the father. They inherited his lopsided smile, and his loving nature towards others.As i watch them run around in the backyard, i still wonder what is was that made a perfect man like him fall for an ordinary girl like me. I've asked him once,but he only smiled in reply.
15th September 1993
It was his funeral today.After an exhausting battle with cancer, God decided to bring him Home. Even till the very end he managed to smile at me every time his eyes fluttered open. I drew strength from his courage. After he was burried, i returned to the cottage he bulit for me and reached out for an envolope. His very last letter to me.
My darling wife Jay,
It has been a long loving journey and i never once regretted knowing and loving you. My time know is limited,my body is alreday showing signs. There are still so many things i wish to say and do for you,so many more memories i wish to make. However,i believe i've already given you the most important thing of all, the knowledge that i love you,i always had and always will..I feel blessed whenever i wake up to the sight of your face of to go to sleep within your warm hug. You are my life,angel and you will always be. This is not goodbye really,it's just till i meet you again. I have to make things perfect for you just i as i always do..remember? I'll build you a perfect house up there and wait keep it spick and span for you. Have no fear when i am gone love,i'll always be close by. Watching over you,keeping you away from harm. Remember the first ever song that we danced to at the party? " Smile an everlasting smile,a smile can bring you near to me,its only words and words are all i have,to take your heart away.."it has been my favourite song ever since..whenever i hear that song, i picture you in that sweet dress swaying to the rhythm in my arms.You were beautiful love,and i fell for you the instant i set my eyes upon you.I'll miss you sweetheart,promise me you'll live a good life.I'm just studying abroad again..only for a longer period alright? i love you,Jay,and i'll be waiting..
with all my love and care,
Simon
15th September 1998
My fingers shook i folded that yellowed piece of parchment again. The sound of laughing children seemed to fade away and my vision started to dim. A bright light ushered me in and i could see a figure comig towards me. In the horizon laid a handsome big house,similar to the structure of my present cottage..
Hello darling,welcome home"..He smiled.
the last breath expired from my lungs and my lips curled upwards into one final smile.
Simon brought me home,finally..
may u guys find true love this valentine! =)
valentine's day influenced =D
It was a chilly Sunday morning as i sat staring at the morning sun.The sound of children's laughter drifted up to me and warmed up my bones from the icy fingers of Jack Frost.The melody of chirping birds transported me back to a brighter summer day..where my steps were lighter and the lines of age were yet to be etched on my features...
30th January,1910
I was at a pool party,enjoying myself..The music was great and the atmosphere was simply lively..Meeting up up with old friends,making new ones,it seemed as if the night could not get any better. Than he came,n he smiled.
"Hey,i'm Simon.This song is really lovely..so,may i have this dance?...."
12th January,1910
It was our first date..N i was feeling rather nervous..He came with a smile, the very same one that i fell for.He held out a rose,a pretty pink one.A small note was attached to the rose and it said
"It's okay if you're not prepared to be in love with me so soon.I know you've been through enough to have your doubts.We don't need to go that far,let's hold on to where we are. For i have faith that if its real we'll make it through.All i'll ever need is you" It was a wonderful day.
14th February 1912
We were at the airport,silent,fingers intertwined. His luggage has already been hauled onto the plane. The last call for his flight has been announced.My fingers tightened as an invisble hand squeezed my throat. He turned around and gave me that beautiful smile once more.Strong as ever,my darling boy
." Darling, i'll have to go now. The time has come for me to study abroad and it would be a long lonely 5 years.I wish i could keep you for myself but that would me selfish of me and cruel to you. I''ll go now and fulfill my dreams of being the perfect husband for you.While i'm gone,i'll not refrain you from other men that may come knocking on the doors of your heart. When i return, you shall be the first person i seek and i'll claim your heart if it is still mine to be owned.I'll wait,and even if my love is in vain,i'll never love another as much as i love you".
When his lips touched mine, i savoured every moment. I sent him off with a brave smile and watched him disappear into the crowd. And i broke down,and cried.
14th March 1917
He was due to return today. We both fulfilled our promise of abstinence from any sort of communication during the 5 years. Longing and missing him has been hard,but i preservered and carried on with my life. Finally that telegram came,announcing his return.I nervously smoothered my hair and looked out for that familiar face. A surge of blood rushed to my cheeks and i realized it was the very same smile.
He's back...
1st of January 1920
Our wedding date.
"I want to make it a double celebration every year love, your birthday and our anniversary.This way, even when i'm old and wrinkled and my memory fades,i'll never forget this date.The begining of every year, a new meaning for us both"
As i walked down that aisle, he stood at the end,tall and proud. We brought up 2 children, both just as handsome and as loving as the father. They inherited his lopsided smile, and his loving nature towards others.As i watch them run around in the backyard, i still wonder what is was that made a perfect man like him fall for an ordinary girl like me. I've asked him once,but he only smiled in reply.
15th September 1993
It was his funeral today.After an exhausting battle with cancer, God decided to bring him Home. Even till the very end he managed to smile at me every time his eyes fluttered open. I drew strength from his courage. After he was burried, i returned to the cottage he bulit for me and reached out for an envolope. His very last letter to me.
My darling wife Jay,
It has been a long loving journey and i never once regretted knowing and loving you. My time know is limited,my body is alreday showing signs. There are still so many things i wish to say and do for you,so many more memories i wish to make. However,i believe i've already given you the most important thing of all, the knowledge that i love you,i always had and always will..I feel blessed whenever i wake up to the sight of your face of to go to sleep within your warm hug. You are my life,angel and you will always be. This is not goodbye really,it's just till i meet you again. I have to make things perfect for you just i as i always do..remember? I'll build you a perfect house up there and wait keep it spick and span for you. Have no fear when i am gone love,i'll always be close by. Watching over you,keeping you away from harm. Remember the first ever song that we danced to at the party? " Smile an everlasting smile,a smile can bring you near to me,its only words and words are all i have,to take your heart away.."it has been my favourite song ever since..whenever i hear that song, i picture you in that sweet dress swaying to the rhythm in my arms.You were beautiful love,and i fell for you the instant i set my eyes upon you.I'll miss you sweetheart,promise me you'll live a good life.I'm just studying abroad again..only for a longer period alright? i love you,Jay,and i'll be waiting..
with all my love and care,
Simon
15th September 1998
My fingers shook i folded that yellowed piece of parchment again. The sound of laughing children seemed to fade away and my vision started to dim. A bright light ushered me in and i could see a figure comig towards me. In the horizon laid a handsome big house,similar to the structure of my present cottage..
Hello darling,welcome home"..He smiled.
the last breath expired from my lungs and my lips curled upwards into one final smile.
Simon brought me home,finally..
may u guys find true love this valentine! =)
choice
this is one of my personal favourite pieces..hope u'll like it too!!
if i had to choose between breathing and l0ving you,
darling i'm sorry but i'd have to choose..
t0 leave y0u f0r l0ving y0u..
is all i'll ever want t0 d0..
i'll use my last breath t0 say i l0ve y0u..
d0n't ever h0ld y0ur feelings back..
let the tears fl0w free, let y0ur cheeks be wet..
i'll wipe them dry..
with the wind that c0mbs thr0ugh the sky..
the cl0uds will part and the sun will shine..
a symb0l of my l0ve divine,
f0r u my dear are the only l0ve of mine..
if i had t0 ch0ose between sight and l0ving y0u,
sweet l0ve i'm s0rry but i have t0 ch0ose..
t0 be blind than t0 stp l0ving y0u..
i d0 n0t need my eyes t0 see y0ur beauty..
f0r y0ur face is etched in me f0r eternity.. y
0ur v0ice will be my guide..
t0 lead me 0ut fr0m darkness t0 light..
words fr0m thy lips soothing melody to my ears..
f0r y0u my dear,r the cure t0 my fears.
if i had t0 ch0ose between silence and l0ving you,
my dear i'd give up b0th ears just t0 keep on loving u..
y0ur smile w0uld give me strength..
it'll reach me th0 we're parted by miles of length..
the s0und of y0ur laughter will play in me like a tune of a broken rec0rd..
repeating itself at its own acc0rd..
f0r y0u my angel,are the harm0ny t0 my ch0rd..
if i had t0 ch0ose between y0u hating me and me l0ving y0u..
h0ney,i'd have t0 let y0u hate me..
watching y0u smile fr0m afar.. seeing y0u shine like a star..
is all i can ever ask f0r..
f0r you are my life,
my little shiny star.
so n0w you kn0w what i'll ch0ose..
i'll cut the r0pes t0 let y0u loose..
if releasing means giving you life..
i'll suffer,when y0u smile it'll all suffice.
i l0ve you, i always will...
i have a blog!!
lol..what a way of starting a first article really =) haha...well, now that i finally have a blog, m gonna have to warn u ppl that it might contain some very romantic stuff that some of you may find corny..that's who i am and what i love writing about.So bear with me people.But i think this place would be mainly where i can pour my heart out and feel better after that =) i have some homework to complete and maybe i'll come back here after im done.adios!
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